#it's the base so I debated tagging it that way but maybe people don't want to see outfits either

[h0riz0nstuff]

Horizon Shitpost.

[bravo4iscool]

Hi! I was wondering if you could write a friends to lovers x reader for any of the 141 (you get to choose) where the reader is plus size and she avoids them touching her? Because she knows she's plus size and doesn't think this super attractive soldier would ever even like her, much less her body, and every time she is touched she kinda pulls away, but our soldiers are so down bad for her? 👀 And ultimately maybe she gets pulled onto a lap and immediately tries to get off? Smut or no smut, it's up to you!

Thank you lovely!! 💞💞

i like this. i like this very very much hehehehe. i chose simon (i always chose him, i really have to change that😭) (i hope you're okay with that tho. it's my personal headcanon that that man is a chubby chaser by heart lol).

as someone who's also plus-size i adore requests like this so much! i hope i could write it the way you imagined it :)

also, sorry this took me so long😭. i had a bit of a slump lol (also, please give me feedback on the smut part, i never really write smut🥲 and im a virgin lmao)

smut, plus-size!reader, unprotected sex, p in v, fem!reader, not proof-read!

(masterlist | join my tag list!)

REQUESTS/ASKS OPEN!!!

tag list - @yazt09 @blackhawkfanatic @bumblebeesfromvenus

"don't touch me simon," you mumble as you push his hands away. "you know i don't like that..." you shuffle away from him and clutch the little notepad you scribble down your customers orders.

he frowns—as always—and gives you a small smile. “‘m sorry lovie. i forgot.”

you nod and straighten your back. “your usual?” you ask, already knowing that he’ll answer with yes. and he does. then you look at the rest of the team, one eyebrow raised. it was rare that they took something else than their usual.

“positive,” price replies, as well as gaz.

“i’ll take whatever ye gimme,” johnny winks and you feel yourself blush. simon just rolls his eyes. he’s getting fed up with his best friend already.

you give johnny a honest smile and scribble something down. “10 minutes and i will be back with your drinks,” you tell them, turning to leave.

once you were out of reach johnny elbowed simon into the side, a devilish smirk on his face. “have ye told ye lassie that ye like her?” he wants to know, wiggling with his eyebrows.

“zip it johnny,” simon only grumbles, starting to bounce his knee. “i ain’t tellin’er nothin’.”

“but why? ye clearly like her.” johnny frowns. if he were in simon’s position he would’ve shot his shot weeks, if not months ago. you were—you were perfection. those curves, those hips and—god forbid—your stomach.

you were hypnotising and you didn’t even know it. johnny didn’t understand how simon could just sit and watch you. he would’ve done anything to get a taste of you, or even just a glance.

“she ain’t interested n’me johnny,” simon sighs after a moment of silence. “i won’t destroy what we have over my stupid feelings.” and with that the debate was over for simon.

before johnny could answer you return with the drinks, placing them down onto the table. “here ya go,” you smile.

“thanks lassie,” johnny grins, patting your hand. you immediately pull away.

you try to overplay it. “no problem. let me know if you need anything else.” you leave with hurried steps, praying you wouldn’t encounter touch again this evening.

-

‘fuck’ you thought when you realize: all seats were taken. this was not good, nope. you just wanted to turn around and leave without anyone taking a notice of you.

but then soap notices you, “ey lassie. com’ere!” he smiles and waves at you. with hesitant steps you walk in his and simon’s direction. giving a apologetic look to the other people. this was a movie night, not some coffee gossip round. it was rare that you were on base and on most occasions you tried to avoid it but johnny and gaz practically begged you to come so you had no other chance than to say yes.

a few moments later you stood in front of the group of men—your friends—unsure what to do. were you just gonna sit on the ground or… before you can even finish that thought a arm wraps around your waist and someone pulls you into their lap. you can‘t suppress a small yelp, your eyes blow wide.

“‘s j‘st me,“ simon whispers into your ear, sending a cold shiver down your spine. you wanted to leave. now.

“simon,“ you hiss. “let me go. i‘m way too heavy for you—“

but instead of following your request his arm around your waist only tightens. “i‘m a big guy. i can handle it,“ he only says in a low voice. with that the topic was done for him and you knew arguing wouldn‘t make sense. once simon was determined about something there was no way to chance his mind.

so, you sat in his lap the whole movie, squirming from time to time; afraid you were too heavy for him, afraid that you would hurt him in any way. meanwhile, his hands were caressing our waist, pulling you closer to him so you‘d stop wiggling around. if you wouldn‘t stop he‘d some have a problem…

beside simon johnny was throwing side glances at him, smirking when he noticed the struggles his best friend was having. he wished he was in that position… if only he‘d been a tad faster than simon you‘d sit in his lap right now and he knew he wouldn‘t be the same after than.

“y‘alright lassie?“ johnny asks as soon as the movie is over and the lights got turned on. your face was red and your pupils blown wide. you only manage a nod, trying your best to get off simon‘s lap as normal—and fast—as possible.

“i think—i think i‘ll go home now. i have work tomorrow morning,“ you smile, still embarrassed. “i hope i‘ll see you tomorrow or are you shipping out?“

“not for at least two weeks,“ simon answers and you nod and turn to leave but then he gets up too and you stop in your tracks. you raise your eyebrow at him and he shrugs. “‘m gonna get ya home,“ he simply says and you nod again.

“alright. see you soon guys,“ you wave your goodbyes to gaz and johnny.

once you and simon where out of reach johnny started to smirk. “ohhhh, he‘s tryna get laid,“ he laughs, glancing at gaz beside him.

“100%“ the other man agrees, hiding his laughter behind his hand. “the question is if she‘s understanding all the signs…“

-

you unlock your door, simon towering over you from behind, his presence like a burning sensation you couldn‘t seem to ignore. “and we‘re there,“ you chuckle, stepping aside. “you can, uh, leave now,“ you tell him but instead of turning around he takes a step inside your flat, closing the door behind him.

“what if i don‘t want to?“ he asks, slowly coming closer to you. “what…if i want to spend the night with you, mh?“ he‘s looking down at you, his hand itching towards to your face.

you swallow, trying to hold his gaze; it seemed impossible. “why would you want that?“ you want to know, unable to phantom any reason he—out of all men—would want to spend a night with you.

he smiles at your question and lowers his head. “because i like you,“ is his answer before he starts to trails kisses down your throat. your breath gets caught and your hands rush to grip his arms. what was happening right now? this must be a dream…

"if you want t'stop, tell me," he mumbles against your neck, slowly pushing you back until your back hits your drawer. you swallow but turn your head to give him more space. it just felt so good.

your breath hitches when he finds your weak spot. "i don't want to stop," you manage to say and you feel him smirk against your skin.

he scoops you up into his arms and you yelp. "that was what i wanted t'hear," he says and seconds later his lips collide with yours as he makes his way to your bedroom. you feel like a feather in his arms, so light and free.

"been wantin' t'do this f'r a long time," simon breathes against your lips when he gently drops you down onto your bed and he pulls back. "y'look so beautiful..." his eyes admire you and you start to blush. you weren't used to being appreciated like that. especially not by men like simon.

he sits up, kneeling in front of you. then he pulls off his shirt in a smooth motion, tossing it aside. your eyes widen and you swallow again. oh steaming jesus, he looked better than you thought–

and suddenly you get aware of your looks again. you try to hide behind your arms as fast as possible, not wanting simon to see but he beats you to it. with gentle hands he grabs your wrists and pulls them away. "why're you doing that, mh?" he wants to know and you avert your gaze.

"i...don't know..." you mumble. "i just–"

he cuts you off before you can finish, "y'think i don't find ya attractive, do ya?" your blush is answer enough and he bents down. "you're the most attractive woman i've ever laid m'eyes upon..." he tells you in a whisper, placing kisses upon your face.

"you don't–"

"oh, i mean it. with every fiber of my being," he, again, cuts you off, not wanting you to doubt his attraction to you. you were beautiful, etheral even, and he didn't know how other men didn't see it. "let me worship you," he pleads, kissing your lips.

he pulls slightly back again and looks in your eyes. he wanted your consent before continung. if you'd say no, he'd stop. if you'd say yes, he would ravish you.

you hesitate for a second before you drag him back down by his neck and press a kiss to his lips. "please," you choke out, looking at him with hooded eyes.

he smiles, his hands slipping beneath your shirt, pushing it upwards. "your wish is my command love." with gentle hands he starts to undress you, trailing kisses all over your body. he wanted to you to feel good about yourself, to feel attractive.

and with every passing moment he was itching down towards your core, smirking when he feels you twitching and shuddering.

“si—simon,” you moan when his lips ghost over your clothed cunt.

he does it again, looking up at you through hooded eyes. “shhhh,” he coos, his tumb caressing your thigh. “b’good f’r me, will ya?” he was straining himself to not rip your clothes off when he started undressing you piece by piece. he wanted to cherish you, burn the image of you sprawled across your bed—naked—into his mind. who knew when he’d be able to see you like that again?

it felt like a haze, the way he was undressing and worshipping your body, his eyes rarely leaving yours. he wanted to you feel seen, to feel lusted after because that was exactly what he was doing.

he came face to face with you again, his lips finding yours while his hand cupped your pussy. your breath hitched. “so ready for me,” he chuckles, his tumb carefully starting to stimulate your clit.

a whine escapes you when he pulls his hand back after a few moments and he can’t suppress a smirk. “oh, ya needy, aren’t ya?” you only manage a nod, your mouth falling open when you feel him slipping one finger inside. “gon’ work ya well open first, love,” he tells you before he starts to litter you with kisses again.

with a steady rhythm he pumps his finger in and out of you, trying to pay attention to your body’s reaction as best as possible. he wanted to make this about you and you only.

he was sucking bruises onto your skin while moans dripped past your lips. oh, he felt like he was in heaven. “keep makin’ them sounds f’r me love,” he mumbles as he starts to hump your bed. his dick was painfully hard by now and he needed to feel some relief.

you gasp and writhe and whine, grabbing his arm to feel something between your hands. “please simon,” you cry out with your back arching off the mattress. “i wanna—“ he shuts you up with a kiss.

“i know what ya want.” and exactly that is the moment your orgasm ripples through you. a dragged out moan leaves your mouth and your fingernails bore into the flesh of his arms. “j’st like that,” simon coos, carefully removing his hand from your cunt.

you gasp for air as you come down from your high, still not 100% sure if this was real; because it didn’t feel like it. you release simon’s arms from your grip, swallowing when you saw the marks you left.

in the meanwhile simon fully undressed himself, his painfully hard cock finally getting set free. he looked at you and a smirk tugged at his lips when he noticed you staring. he tugged at his cock before he crawled back onto the bed to hover about you.

you look up at him, unsure of what to do. it’s been probably years since you’ve last had sex. it wasn’t that much of a regular thing in your life.

“ya ready?” he asks you after he connects your lips in a gentle kiss. you nod and he carefully starts to open your legs further. “i’ll be gentle, yea?”

simon’s hands caress your thighs before he aligns his cock with your entrance and trains his eyes on you as he starts to push himself inside.

your mouth falls open and your hands find their way back to grip onto his arms. a tear slips past your eye and a loud moan drags past your lips. “simon—oh my god!”

he grunts, doing his best to hold himself back from restlessly pounding into you. he didn’t want to hurt you. “no god ‘ere love. only me.” he bends down to kiss you and one of his hands starts to stimulate your clit again.

when he fully bottomed out it took all of his self control to not come immediately. he’s dreamed of this for months, years even and not it was finally happening.

“takin’ me s’good,” simon whispers in your ear, slowly pulling his hips back, making you whine before he pushes them forward again, pulling another moan out of you. “this pussy was made for me, huh.” a cocky grin was on his face.

you nod and babble, too overwhelmed by that pleasure that was so unknown to you. “wanna be good for you,” you cry, clutching his arm with your hands. “please simon.”

he starts to trail kisses down your throat while he keeps his thrusts in a steady rhythm. he felt his orgasm building but he wouldn’t come before you didn’t. this wasn’t about him and his pleasure, this was about you.

you moan, “oh—oh—“ when you feel the knot in your stomach tightening. “i’m gonna come simon,” your voice trembles.

“i know,” he grits out as he fastens his thrusts and keeps stimulation your clit. the way you were clenching around him had him seeing stars. you were so close.

and then he pushes you over the cliff, your orgasm rippling through you with a force you didn’t know as possible. your vision fades to black and your mouth falls open as simon fucks you through your orgasm.

he’s trying his best to keep his composure when you clench around him, almost milking him but he pushes through, managing a couple sloppy thrusts before he comes with a deep moan, fully burying himself inside you.

his eyes are closed as he tries to take a deep breath, a faint ‘i love you’ leaving his lips.

(i’m sorry the end is like that. i’m terrible at endings🧍🏼. i didn’t know how to properly cut this😭)

[utilitycaster]

if you're up to elaborating, i would love to hear more about your complicated feelings on Taliesin's reads of this campaign, because that's something that's been itching my brain but I'd been having a hard time pinpointing why and I'm interested to hear your thoughts!

So I think it's best summarized in part as a combination of what was said in this post I just reblogged and these tags from @kerosene-in-a-blender on this post:

#yeeeaaaahhhh#ngl it seems like the characters and parts of the cast got so caught up in the potential moral dilemma of interventionist gods#that they forgot the gods of exandria aren't particularly interventionist#critical role#critical role spoilers#cr spoilers

Ashton feels like they learned something about their own arrogance and assumptions with Shardgate...and then it just vanished. And the fact that Taliesin genuinely read that as what was supposed to happen when like 3-4 authority figures, some of whom (Allura) have existed since Campaign 1 as People To Listen To had said "This is a bad idea" in plain language does give me pause because like...with all due respect, I get why Ashton would do this anyway! But come on, man, how do you hear that and not go "oh maybe it's a bad idea."

I don't want to read in too much to cooldown and 4SD either but I really do just feel that like...some of the cast, and Taliesin isn't alone in this but definitely seems to be using it the most in-game, have come under the impression that the purpose of this campaign is specifically to upend everything we knew...but that idea is just an assumption that is not supported, and as I've said repeatedly, there is no situation in which the world is not drastically changed - there's going to be either a hostile alien invasion, or a friendly alien migration, but either one will be monumental within Exandrian history, and that's not counting the establishment of the Accord/the collapse of local institutions in both the Dwendalian Empire and Bassuras/ If one cannot see any possibility for vast change within the world other than killing/driving out the gods, I don't know how to address this nicely. This is an uncreative and stupid position that I can't engage with because it's so stupid. It's like saying World War II didn't change anything in our world because at the end of it the US and USSR both still existed largely intact. So the over-focus on only one means of change in a way that feels based on an interpretation of this campaign's purpose that isn't even stated anywhere is telling and deeply frustrating.

As the second post indicates, it feels like some of the cast, Taliesin especially, got caught up in a theological argument of divine intervention that personally I had a great time debating in Hebrew school when I was 13, but is not ultimately true in Exandria (or reality, for that matter). On some level it's like maybe read some Harold Kushner and you'll calm down; it feels like you're arguing against like, some very real religious tenets (that are not exclusively Christian for once) but in a story where that's not actually a problem.

I'd throw in that Bells Hells sit in this awkward place of not being nobodies (or Nobodies) anymore but many are still acting like it and Ashton is at the forefront. Indeed, look at the name "the Nobodies." The problem is that Ashton is a Somebody now. He's not like, the ruler of a city, or an ancient dragon, or a god. But they're someone who has the personal raw power and the connections to survive an ill-considered second shard absorption. They're someone who is easily going to survive a fall out of a window, and who can't be bound into service. They are someone who has been entrusted by the world to assist in saving it, and they're too fixated on the gods not personally saving them to consider the vast potential harm to others, and I think it's not inherently out of callousness but rather that they've rather abruptly risen from "orphan criminal who expected to be dead by 30" to "guy tasked to save the world" but they have no option but to rise to the occasion, as the Raven Queen said. To change the world, he must change himself, and I feel like Taliesin, who often enjoys the idea of characters who don't change, is perhaps too wed to that concept for this particular narrative. And, for what it's worth: I've said it before that my personal preference is to keep the gods in place...but I would genuinely be MILES happier with a party that decisively had decided to kill the gods. I would not agree with their decision, but anything is better than this indecision. And since Ashton is pretty staunchly in favor of killing the gods and the rest of the party is varying degrees of strongly against (Orym, Braius), weakly against (Chetney, Fearne, Imogen, increasingly Laudna) and unsure but worried specifically about the mortal impact (Dorian) at some point it's like. Either say "I don't like this, but this is the party's plan" or leave. The decisiveness matters on an individual level too; because Bells Hells does not have good internal methods of resolving conflict for reasons stated above and below, at some point it's like. You have to give it up because no one will make you. If Ashton genuinely cannot or will not yield on this, either commit to betraying the party (totally valid, could be a great story) or have them leave; if Ashton does trust the party, have them reluctantly give in. A party-wide choice must be made and fast. The party is aimless because they are all pulling in different directions and it all cancels out, but Ashton is definitely contributing extensively to that agonizing stasis.

I suppose I should wrap up with what I've been saying a lot but should probably go on this post which is that a lot of the flaws in this campaign are not any singular person's fault. I really do feel like they began with the fact that Matt was clearly building to this specific story, and Bells Hells were not a party terribly suited to it in the first place and then were given an earlier narrative that, because it was heavily on rails to get them to the solstice setpiece, failed to give them the tools to become people who would be prepared for this endgame. I think Matt really wanted the cast to make the decisions here, and did not have a specific decision in mind, and now they're all finding that they're playing characters who can't make that decision. It's a culmination of a lot of smaller out-of-game choices that have failed to gel into a coherent whole. When I say the Raven Queen was right, and if they are not ready for this, to go home, I don't think the party should be tpk-ed or anything, but yeah, if they can't decide what to do when they are essentially tasked with killing the BBEG and diffusing the universe-shattering bomb, they should abdicate. I don't think a story in which the heroes fail is a bad one. I know Call of the Netherdeep has been a touchstone in the fandom throughout this campaign and there's one possible ending to that that's sort of unsatisfying, but the unsatisfying nature itself makes it an interesting story to me. I think this campaign ending with the party saying "we can't do this" is vanishingly unlikely, and complaints aside I think they will probably make a decision now but it all feels exceedingly doylist - Bells Hells are the characters the cast happens to be playing for this climactic final moment so I guess they will play those characters, and those characters will have to make a choice so that the final moment happens, but it doesn't feel terribly organic.

[lanawinterscigarettes]

How Allison Cameron would react to a reader who has low empathy

Warnings: Cameron being a little insensitive at first due to ignorance, general warning for her guilt trippy/overly judgmental nature (which I personally love tbh but that's just me), brief mentions of death/sickness in a medical setting/context

A/N: this is partially based on the opposites attract trope but I mostly just wanted to write something with Cameron being her pathetic self /affectionate

Honestly knowing Cameron she would most likely be pretty judgmental of you at first I'm not even going to lie, probably even going as far as to avoid you unless it was absolutely necessary to work together

This would only be lessened some if you were her superior or someone who she looked up to in general (basically someone like House)

Even then she'd still be a tad bit wary of you, probably assuming that because you display low empathy you don't really care about other people

Obviously that's an outdated stereotype that doesn't apply to every single person with low empathy but as someone who wears her heart on her sleeve for everyone to see she'd most likely buy into it

It's only when she sees you comforting the family of a dying patient that she realizes you actually do care, just in a different way that she does

She does her best to put her preconceived notions about you to the side so she can get to know you better, and finds out that you're actually a decent person, if not the best

Sure, you struggle with empathy and displaying your feelings in a way that seems genuine, but it doesn't make you a bad person. It's just the way you are

Realizing she made a mistake when it came to judging you before she even got to know you, she for sure goes out of her way trying to make it up to you, even if you insist it's fine

She gains a new perspective and a certain amount of respect for you after that- and if you want to go down that road, maybe she even goes so far as to forming some sort of crush on you like she did for House, though whether it's because she actually likes you or because she thinks she can "fix" you is up for debate

End notes: I love Cameron so much she's my favorite girlfailure ever <3

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[trans-ace-lee]

That Darn Cat

Author's Note: So sorry for the very, very, very late upload and me being almost nonexistent on this website. In short, a bunch of life changes happened, and I 1000% don't get paid enough to do as much work as I have to do.

Thanks for being so patient with me. This a sequel to Wow Fantasstic Baby and is a product of my brain just going feral. If that what it takes to write fics, then that's what it is, I guess.

Tagging @myreygn @otomiya-tickles @ticklishfanart and a special shoutout to @parker-fluff for being my test subject to @italeean (I hope this is a nice wake up call Elle).

It was no secret that Tsukishima was an observant person. Both on and off the court, his teammates and friends know that although he doesn’t say much, he’s always watching and thinking. Thus, it came to no one’s surprise that he had picked up on a substantial amount of Kuroo’s likes, dislikes, routines, and habits in the few months they had been dating.

Despite the latter’s mess of a hairstyle, Tsukishima had found that he loves running his fingers through Kuroo’s hair and scratching at the base of Kuroo’s neck; his boyfriend, of course, loves it too. He adores the way Kuroo melts into his touch and how Kuroo hums under his breath, recording these little moments in his heart to be played over and over again until the day comes when he can’t remember.

Tsukishima isn’t the kind of person for grand gestures. He shows his love through small, handcrafted gifts made from the leftover scraps from Yamaguchi’s many art projects, daily updates about what he’s doing, sending pictures, finding scented candles that remind him of his loved ones, and reminders about important dates like quizzes and doctor’s appointments.

But lately, Tsukishima notices that the third year’s replies to text messages and phone calls decrease in frequency. It’s not as if he doesn’t understand. Third years have college entrance exams, plus his duties as a volleyball captain with a team going to nationals. He has his own exams and volleyball practice to attend to. Sure, he wants Karasuno to beat Nekoma if given the chance, but he plans on giving his boyfriend a needle-felt cat and maybe a kiss, no matter the outcome.

Instead of mourning the time he’s losing and whining to his boyfriend to pay attention to him, he finds himself worried about Kuroo because he knows that trying too hard not to let go is like trying to hold onto wet sand. And, yet part of him is still insecure because this is his first relationship, and he’s terrified of messing everything up. He has a small but strong support system, but they’re people who know the deeper parts of him that he hides behind walls.

After blurting these fears out loud on accident while talking with Kenma to double-check if his observations are correct, Tsukishima finds himself with a free bus ticket to Tokyo. During the many hours it takes to get from Miyagi to Tokyo, he can’t help but think he’ll see a side of Kuroo that he’s never seen before.

Regardless, he wants the latter to open up to him and show him every side, the bad, the sad, the ugly, the calm, the cheerful, and everything in between. In time, he hopes to do the same.

This afternoon, on the rare day that Kuroo takes a break from studying, his boyfriend is practically sprawling on top of Tsukishima’s lap while Tsukishima runs his fingers through the former’s hair.

“I want, uh, want to do something for you,” Tsukishima says, his face heating up a little as he breaks the silence in the room.

“Hmm?” Kuroo mumbles in response, “But you already do so much for me, love.”

Tsukishima debates hiding his face behind his hands. He absolutely adores how Kuroo still makes him feel like a giddy little kid, as surprising as it is to imagine him that way (Yamaguchi won’t stop making fun of him, not that he minds).

“I know…” He takes a deep breath and leans down to plant a kiss on the back of Kuroo’s neck. “You’ve been really stressed lately, and I just want to help relieve your pain in any way I can.”

Kuroo pushes himself up on his forearms so he can look Tsukishima in the eye. Kuroo’s gaze is filled with such warmth and understanding that Tsukishima falls in love with him over and over again. No matter Tsukishima’s limited and feeble attempts to comfort his boyfriend, Kuroo always treats him with such kindness and grace, letting him warm up at his own speed. He admits that opening up again is hard, but he’s willing to do it for Kuroo.

“All right. What do you want me to do, then?”

Tsukishima bites his lip. Okay, maybe he hasn’t thought this through enough. He tries to think of something, anything that he can do to erase the tension lines in his lover’s face and the stiffness in his lover’s shoulders, until a small voice in the back of his mind has him fighting back a smirk. “Can you lie down on your stomach?”

“Like this?” Kuroo asks, stretching himself out on Tsukishima’s bed with his arms crossed over his head.

Tsukishima slings his right leg over Kuroo’s body and sits down on his butt.

“Ooh. I think I’m going to like this.”

This time Tsukishima actually smirks now that Kuroo can’t see him. He expects his boyfriend to squirm or even at least twitch when he squeezes Kuroo’s sides. What he doesn’t expect is to hear a loud shriek followed by rapid giggling. “I’m just trying to give you a back massage, darling. Won’t you be good and stay still for me?”

The only response he gets is a shaky fuck off.

“Tch. I guess someone better teach this naughty cat a lesson.” He grins at the way Kuroo immediately starts squirming at his words. “Oh? The flirty tom cat can’t take what he dishes out. Don’t worry, I’ll teach you to behave.”

Okay.

Tsukishima knows he should feel a little guilty, but his boyfriend’s squeaks and snorts of protest as his drums his fingers on Kuroo’s sides. But he loves the way the latter shakes his head from side to side, making his bed hair even messier than usual. Scratch that, he kind of loves everything about the figure cackling even harder than Tsukishima had been before when he skitters up Kuroo’s ribs.

“Naaahaahahat there,” the latter begs, trying to grab Tsukishima’s hands.

Kuroo fails every time.

“Hmmmmm?” he says while alternately poking each side of his lover’s ribs just to see him jump. “Then…how about here?”

The cackling gets replaced by a long howl that’s almost painful to his ears.

Good.

He snickers. “Attention neighbors of this small apartment with hopefully thick walls, I need to report a murder. Cause of death some fingers resting on a set up very, very, very ticklish underarms.”

Leaning down next to Kuroo’s left ear, Tsukishima asks, “Left, right or both.”

And he thought his boyfriend was a little sadistic when Tsukishima was getting tickled the last time.

“FUUHUCK,” Kuroo screams, his arms clamped to his sides.

“Oh, it can’t be that bad. I’m not even doing anything.” Tsukishima squints at the shiny dot on his lover’s face. “Wait? Is that a tear I see?”

Kuroo whines.

Tsukishima, with some strength he didn’t even know he had, flips the latter over and pins Kuroo’s hands over his head. “Nope. That absolutely won’t do. I want to see that cute face of yours.”

It takes everything in him not to coo at his boyfriend on the spot as he looks down with a soft smile on his face. Kuroo’s face is flushed, more so than any match he’s seen him in. He relishes the way Kuroo tries in vain to hide his face in his arms. Even the bright red color of his ears matches his face.

Kuroo is so hot like this.

Another squeak of protest breaks the silence.

Tsukishima’s smirk returns at the sound. “Sounds like someone is a fan of that.”

“Nohohoooo.” Kuroo replies, now giggling and squirming from anticipation.

“Now, raise your arms above your head and keep them there.”

“WHAT,” his lover squawks, mouth agape.

He plants a kiss on Kuroo’s forehead. “You heard me love. Or…do I need to do something a little more drastic?”

“I-Ihii…whaaa…?” Kuroo replies, his face growing redder and redder by the second.

“Cat got your tongue? Don’t worry I have an even better idea for you.” He uses one hand to pin both of his lover’s wrists and uses the other hand to grab the latter’s chin so they’re looking at each other. “Please move dow-no, you will move down so I can sit on those pesky arms of yours.”

Somehow Kuroo’s face grows even redder at the command but scoots down like he’s told, albeit while glaring at Tsukishima. Nope. Tsukishima is definitely not proud of himself for that one. Not at all.

Turning around, yet still keeping a strong grip on Kuroo’s wrists, he uses his right leg to pin his boyfriend’s right arm and his left leg to pin his boyfriend’s left arm until he’s more or less just kneeling on them. “Yes…Yes, this is much better,” he says with a low hum that rumbles in his chest.

Kuroo pouts up at him. It’s so fucking adorable that Tsukishima wants to take a picture, so he does as the former only pouts harder at the action. “You don’t want to bully your poor boyfriend, do you? You wouldn’t do something like this to him, would you?”

“Sorry, dear.” He uses his right hand to massage circles onto the base of Kuroo’s neck. The all-familiar hum follows as he moves up the back of the latter’s head and kneads on his scalp.

Once Kuroo is sufficiently relaxed, he digs a single finger into the center of Kuroo’s right underarm. His lover almost leaps off the bed with a high-pitched squeal. It’s music to his ears.

“SHIHIIT,” Kuroo screams before breaking into desperate laughter and flopping around like a fish out of water.

“Now you’re just being dramatic,” Tsukishima teases, “It’s just one little finger. How bad could it be?”

“IIIHIIT’S BAAHAHAD." His boyfriend’s legs wave back and forth in a frantic matter, reminiscent of something straight out of a horror movie.

Kuroo has many sides, sides that Tsukishima has yet to see, but he thinks this might be his favorite. In everyday life, both on and off the court, his lover is calm, cool, and poised. This side of Kuroo is a wild beast he can’t wait to tame. He wants to learn which buttons he can push, and perhaps what his boyfriend will do in return.

“Hmm? I don’t know. I think you can get more desperate than this. I guess we’ll just have to see, then.”

“FUUHUCK OFFF!” Kuroo tries to hiss but it ends up sounding like the high-pitched sound of a tea kettle going off.

Tsukishima settles into a rhythm. Alternating between left and right with a single finger right in the center has Kuroo practically wailing. Spidering around the edges until little hiccups and snorts start to filter through his lover’s laughter. Raking his fingers from the middle of Kuroo’s ribs up to the bottom of his biceps makes him blubber and babble like a brook filled with rocks of all shapes and sizes.

And, once Kuroo almost gets used to the pattern, he wiggles all five fingers into each underarm which has the former straight up screaming like he’s being murdered.

After the nth round of this routine, because Tsukishima has all but forgotten…oops, Kuroo’s begging and pleading becomes incoherent.

“FUUHUHUUU! NGHHHH! NAAAAA MOHORE!”

“Really, more?” Tsukishima asks. “Don’t forget, you asked for this.”

Tears stream down his boyfriend’s face as his laughter finally goes silent. “I…c…an’t…”

“Okay. Okay. I think you’ve had enough, silly,” Tsukishima replies with a chuckle, crawling off Kuroo’s arms and helping the latter sit up. Biting his lip, he says, “I didn’t take it too far, did I?”

“What!” Kuroo squawks, waving his hands in front of his chest and then covering his face with his hands. “No. no. I…uh…kindoflikedit.”

Oh.

Oh.

“Say it again.”

Kuroo tries to hide his face in his hands again. “Nooooo,” he whines. “You already heard it once. I’m not saying it again.”

“Oh come on,” Tsukishima says, bending down to give his boyfriend another kiss, “Be good and tell me again, clearly this time. I want to hear every word.”

Another sound akin to a wheezing kettle comes out of his lover’s mouth. “Oh. My. God. You can’t just say stuff like that.”

 “But I can, and I will,” Tsukishima replies. He could get used to this. Kuroo all flustered for him. “Now say it.”

“Nooooooo.”

“I’m waiting.”

“...Fine.” Kuroo takes a deep breath. “I. Liked…it.”

 “Well…I guess that makes two of us, then,” Tsukishima peppering Kuroo’s face with kisses until his boyfriend is giggling. 

“As long as I get to get my revenge, of course.” Kuroo reaches over to squeeze Tsukishima’s thigh just to hear him squeak.

If he was a different person, he would be pouting, but he settles on prying his lover’s hands away from his face and planting a kiss upon his lips.

“But…We need a safe word or something, so we know for sure if we go too far,” Kuroo says after their lips part, his voice coming out more breathy than normal.

“Mhmm. Yeah. I don’t want to actually kill my boyfriend.”

Kuroo glares back at him in a playful manner. “Based on today, you’re sure as hell going to get as close to that as possible.”

“You love me anyways,” Tsukishima replies while pulling Kuroo into his arms.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.”

[the-black-bulls]

I don't mean this in a bad way at all but anytime there's any black clover polls about "best captain best vice captain best dressed best character design most lgbtq etc etc" most people don't even really think about who the title applies to the most, like actually

they just vote for their favorite characters 😭 like there could be a "best wizard king" post and somehow yami would be there winning. but I guess there's not really any harm and it is fun voting for your favs though so maybe I'm just being a Fun Police lol sorry.

Your most queer poll is fun though and the black bulls in general are just very lgbtq so everyone's a winner 😄

Hey there, anon. It took me a couple of days to get around your ask because I wanted to post the last round of the queerest bull poll and the bonus poll first, sorry for keeping you wait.

Well, I believe bias is pretty common in polls in general, not just with black clover, but most fandom spaces tend to have the fan favorites dominate polls and tournaments. As soon as you ask for the best or the worst, people will vote based on their bias. That's not always the case of course and sometimes the fan favorite deserves to win or is likely to win, but I believe most people, including myself, don't think too hard before voting. Yami is my favorite captain, Nacht is also my favorite vice captain, I'd vote for them unless the poll in question or the tags made it clear to vote for the most deserving of their title or the best written or the objectively best one. NOW, that might make pause a little to think of my vote.

In short, the more generic and unspecific the poll, the more likely to have generic and predictable results. However at the end of the day most fandom polls are subjective and bias-driven. I have my opinion and you have yours and people have theirs, NOW wouldn't it be cool if we all reblog with our own arguments? That's one thing I wish we do more often in the black clover fandom, like how someone wrote some long post about Kirsch under the vice captain poll which did make me consider voting for him! In general, I love reading people's takes and debating them with mine 😛

Anyway... yeah, I get where you're coming from and I definitely feel like it's unfair to certain characters from time to time, but as you've said yourself there's no harm done. And hey, I'm glad you found the queerest black bulls tournament enjoyable! I'm a little disappointed Grey didn't make it past the first round, but I don't mind the results. Those problem kids are all queer, anyway 😆

[saintsenara]

I have really enjoyed reading your answers to the rare pair tag game. I have added a lot of the fics that you recommended on your latest answer to my 'Marked for Later' list on a03 to enjoy over the weekend. I was wondering your honest thoughts are on the following ships: Tom/Ron, James/Snape, Tom/Hermione, Molly/Bellatrix, James/Regulus and Snape/Lily and Dudley/Draco. I apologise for the number of ships and I am really curious on your opinions.

thank you so much for the ask, @sarafina-sincerity - and for continuing my recent tradition of offering opinions nobody else wanted to hear on an increasingly unhinged list of pairings.

[i know you sent a message apologising for sending some ships which were asked before, but i love to chatter, so i'm going in to answer the original...]

tom riddle | voldemort/ron weasley

obviously this is the crack pairing when it comes to voldemort + a member of the trio - while tomarrymort and tomione/volmione stories number into the thousands on ao3, voln/ton/rom/ronmort/whatever we're calling it has a grand total of... ten tagged works.

i think this is a tremendous shame, but not - it's important to say - because i agree with the tedious fanon idea, particularly prevalent in ships which feature hermione with anyone else, that ron would make a good death eater [as you will see below, i think that honour belongs firmly to hermione herself...] - even in a voldemort wins au, ron isn't going over to the dark side. it sounds too much like hard work.

instead, i'm into this pairing because ron is... kind of mother. he likes to look after people and he channels his negative emotions into doing this [he wouldn't have left the tent if harry and hermione had learned how to shoplift properly and he could be settled in front of a nice pot, i'll die on that hill]. just imagine little captive ron - maybe the snatchers recognised him, maybe voldemort's won and everyone else is dead - bustling around his gilded prison in malfoy manor making the dark lord a cup of tea when he turns up to psychologically torture him. voldemort would - as i am - be intrigued.

and if, in fact, you'd like to see almost exactly this situation play out, you will definitely enjoy wind tunnels by @mrmxlemons. ron isn't having a good time, but his cooking is.

james potter/severus snape

i've not read much snames, so this is mostly just based on general vibes: i think it's fine but not fantastic.

as i've said in literally everything i've ever posted about sirius black/severus snape, snack is a great pairing because they're narrative mirrors, something which creates so much drama that it makes me scream.

severus and james don't have this - if anything, they're narrative opposites. james is adored by his parents, he's rich, he gets the girl, his best friend is in love with him and not the other way round, he's the ringleader of his gang rather than a follower, his whole family have been gryffindors, and so on and so forth. obviously opposites attract, but you haven't got the immediate potential for connection that you have between severus and characters such as sirius, lily, and - let's all be real - voldemort.

i'm not really going to get into the bullying debate here, but it seems to me that severus would regard james - had he lived - in a similar way to how he regards the adult lupin; that is, that he would completely disassociate from any situation in which he's present, rather than love getting in his face as he does with sirius. i don't love snupin for this reason [i'll read it, of course, but it always feels extremely ooc to me] - the fissure caused by their conflicting personalities simply runs too deep, and my suspicion is that snames is the same.

hermione granger/tom riddle | voldemort

so, this is the one where I think I'm likely to deviate most significantly from the opinions of my dash...

i think it's entirely plausible, but only from hermione's side.

the argument i've seen most against tomione/volmione is that hermione's moral code would never permit her to accept anything less than a voldemort who was transformed into a man she would want - which means the whole murder thing needs to get thrown in the bin.

i... disagree. the canonical hermione is someone who is very morally inflexible in relation to how she expects others to behave, but incredibly morally flexible - and often quite immoral - in pursuit of things she herself wants or thinks she wants. she is also the cruelest and most ruthless member of the trio. she thinks herself rational and would - therefore - be the easiest for anyone cleverer than rita skeeter to manipulate. she is very lonely, and would, in a situation in which she was captured, be the member of the trio most swayed by basic demonstrations of kindness [lord voldemort only needs to endure a brief conversation about hogwarts: a history and hint that harry and ron aren't coming to look for her and he's golden]. she always thinks she's right - if she's convinced just by harry and ron not telling her otherwise that her knitted hats are freeing house elves in their droves, i am certain she could be convinced that she won concessions for muggleborns under voldemort's regime through her own skill and not because he wanted to grant them anyway. and so on.

whether the relationship is something she has to do or wants to do, i think she'd be able to justify it to herself as a necessary evil which doesn't actually go against her standards for herself. that she would never think this for harry and ron if they shacked up with the dark lord is part of the fun...

from voldemort's perspective, while he definitely has a weakness for dark curly hair [bellamort nation, rise up], i cannot see him going for it as anything other than a tool of psychological warfare [whereas i think you can write e.g. tomarry based very much in mutual attraction]. intellectually, while hermione is very clever, she doesn't have the interest in experimentation which voldemort has [this is why snapemort and riddledore both always slap - they have the same views on magic], she's extremely condescending, which is his thing, she obviously grew up incredibly rich, and her dour, whiggish empiricism doesn't align very well with his late-antique-emperor's view of the world.

she doesn't give a shit about dead rabbits though. maybe they could bond over that.

bellatrix lestrange/molly weasley

yeah why not. they canonically went to hogwarts at the same time and bellatrix is definitely giving off jilted ex vibes in that final duel.

would molly put up with bella's nonsense? absolutely not. bellatrix would have exactly the same reaction as fleur to the burrow - nothing to do except cooking and chickens - and the ensuing argument would burn the place to the ground far more interestingly than that dogshit scene in the half-blood prince film.

regulus black/james potter

i don't know her, sorry.

lily evans/severus snape

as i said here, i'm into it in a post-james world where lily is trying to rebuild her life by connecting with her past.

so let's take it from a different angle: do i think it could work in the pre-james era?

absolutely not. i think these two need something as seismic as catastrophic loss to force them to actually engage with each other as they are, rather than as the versions they've constructed in their heads. at school, where they're both just dancing round each other, never seeing eye-to-eye on anything, they're never going to be able to get to that place.

i also think james needs to be out of the picture - she's clearly into him long before the mudblood incident, and that knowledge would only ever make severus astonishingly unpleasant to have as a boyfriend. rip king, but you were lost in service of shipping.

dudley dursley/draco malfoy

yeah it's hot. boxer!dudley is enormous and ripped, what's not to love. draco deserves a huge boy who also hates harry.

plus imagine narcissa vs petunia on the topic of their darling boys. or lucius vs vernon when the former pulls up to privet drive in a flying rolls royce. i would be seated.

[agenericarcadebot]

[Out of Character Pinned Post!]

[the old one didn't explain much]

"What is this blog about?"

This is a roleplay/ask blog for Ruin in my AU! He's silly with some dark lore, identity issues, and fully innocent unlike in the show. This blog is also a game of choices, and all actions have consequences, whether good ones or bad. The story will progress with or without input through what I call "events", which are things that happen around Ruin that cause him to post the things he does. He's very vague and gives little to no detail on what goes on, but you can always ask him to elaborate.

(more below the cut ↓)

"Are non-sams roleplay blogs allowed to interact?"

Yes, always! Sams is all about dimensions and Ruin himself isn't even from the main dimension. Roleplay blogs of any kind are allowed, just keep in mind that you don't actually appear in the main dimension (aside from special cases, such as @blip-cluster needing to communicate through the cabinets)

Ruin is always looking for more friends or people to talk to.

"Will there be a way to sort through posts?"

Yes, soon. I'm thinking of tags to better categorize his posts. This was originally supposed to be anonymous so I didn't want to add any tags or anything that would give me away, but I've told pretty much anyone who keeps up with this blog who I am, so you can easily search through things soon.

"Magic anon?"

Absolutely. Torture him if you'd like. I mean with. With fun things don't pull an Eclipse—

"What does the colored text mean?"

The colored text is based on his eyes. He's still a fusion of Sun and Moon, but... Well... I think that's a question for him.

Blue text is for his blue eye, usually tied to fear or stress, and isn't "Ruin is sad so he's speaking in blue text."

Red text is for his red eye, usually tied to extreme emotions or heavy stress, and isn't "Ruin is angry so he's speaking in red text."

Green text is for the virus. Does it show up? Possibly in the future. It's up to the players to figure it out.

"What about names and pronouns?"

This is a bit tricky as the name will likely change over the course of the blog, and pronouns are up for debate as well. But currently the character goes by "Ruin", and uses any pronouns he's assigned. He typically uses he/they, so anything else would probably surprise him, but he wouldn't stop you.

"Who is Egg?"

Egg is Ruin's plush. It was originally supposed to have a proper name, butttt I got a bit bored of needing "names that mean something for the lore", and decided eggs would be funny since it's my comfort meal.

Egg was originally a Moon plush but its head got torn off by a raccoon that a magic anon summoned. He found an extra Sun plush that was already quite worn down and wouldn't be missed as well as a small doll hat, and someone stitched it back together for him.

Feel free to ask Egg questions, it's Ruin's favorite plush, and I assure you that he'd love talking about the little stories he's made up for Egg.

(And maybe there's secret Egg lore, I'll never tell.)

"What's the lore like?"

Well, buckle up, and I'll tell you the story.

Ruin was infested with the virus for the longest time, and when confronted by Moon with the cure, he was fully cured. He was shoved to the side and took to life in the arcade, fixing cabinets and getting better by the day, singing and performing to a crowd of nobody but himself in his room during his free time, and avoiding the cabinets that "smiled at him"

He eventually made the blog as a sort of escape, where he met his friends @eclipseoftheapocalypse and @eclipse-cluster, and eventually @blip-cluster as well. He also encountered some magic anons which summoned plushies of Sun, Moon, and his friends. Moon eventually became Egg as mentioned previously.

His mood only gets worse as time goes on, but the reason why is a reason the players will have to find out for themselves. There are many things that contribute to it, not just Moon's distrust.

"Admit it. You named the blog after a reference."

Yeah and what're you gonna do about it? Get a snack at 4am, probably.

Ruin's blog name, "agenericarcadebot", is a reference to the store in GASA4 (Get a Snack at 4AM, a game on Roblox. Absolutely recommend it), which is named "A Generic Convenience Store." I thought it would be funny. Also he's self-deprecating, so it fit.

(Special thank-you to my friends who are currently keeping this blog alive. I have so many plans for him and you guys keeping up with it makes me happy. I was scared you guys would get bored with it the second it was no longer anonymous, but seeing you guys' reactions to things he says makes me happy. I made this blog so I could see people smile, that's the whole reason, I made this blog so people who like Ruin could interact with him and have a good time. I'm glad that the original purpose wasn't retconned the second I revealed myself. So thank you, and I love you.)

[scover-va]

I need to know more about Michael's mom... Is she a cool mom?

SHE IS A VERY COOL MOM janet afton you will always be famous. to me

Im taking this as a chance to finally ramble abt her anyways so Janet's core inspo when designing her was to avoid 2 key things. Don't make her like Immortal & Th Restless's Clara (due to clara representing michael, not mrs afton, so i wanted to avoid that), and don't base her too heavily off of Ballora. I still have ties to Ballora's character (a music-based theme, blue-centric colour palette, im sure there were more basic ideas but everything else is more hc than themes to keep up) due to my hc thingy of each Funtime having ties to William's wife + kids, but yknow.

But yeah. Funky lady who played bass guitar + did backup vocals in a band during her high school and college years. Literally her and William dating can be summed up by "Seriously, what do you see in that guy?!" "He makes me laugh." bc she was and is WAY out of his goddamn league. Not just bc of the whole serial killer thing he was just an even bigger loser in college. Normal people dont develop a crush on a woman after she nearly breaks your nose and makes you bleed, William /j

But yeah uhh. I also dont like the idea of her being absent or neglectful purely because I got way too attached to her (i was originally gonna do that just to make things easy for myself but. Pretty lady,,, I am a very simple lesbian what can i say) so like. She obviously wasnt the greatest, most fantastic mom to ever exist given she was kinda maybe sorta well aware William was making some weird fucking clowns, but like. Hey. She tried. Also side note my reasoning for her being absent during the whole. Yknow. '83 event (and just evan's bday in general) is bc Evan + Elizabeth are twins and Elizabeth demanded a girls-only trip for her bday, and Janet promised Evan she'd do something just as special for him when she got back. That never happened bc he died lmao loser /j

But yeah uhh. Shes got a lot of regrets. Wishes she coulda done a lot of things better. Kinda dies with those regrets. Ive seen people say that one of fnaf's charms is that no character is 100% good and i LOVE that, and wanted to keep it up with Janet. Good mom and overall a good person, however made some bad decisions along the way and whatnot.

Im still working out specifics (ive been slowly working on a lil private fic abt her and william meeting + their early relationship) but uhhh. Minor notes that dont get their own paragraphs is that William sampled her voice for Ballora so yay easy voice claim, she had an on and off relationship with her band's lead singer (her name's Bev), her birth name is actually Janice Schmidt but if you call her Janice she'll knock at least 2 of ur teeth out, she's a runaway teen and got adopted by this older couple bc her home life kinda sucked (idk specifics yet), and also girlie has an extensive criminal record of minor angsty teen type charges. Also teen Mike dying his hair and then 2020's Michael's hairstyle are both kinda references to Janet's hair because he wnated to look less like his father. Thats all ty. No read more bc you WILL look at my mrs afton post, boy /j

Actually no theres more that im remembering as i write the tags and edit a few details. Back to her and William because god im insane about them. So for starters it. Well i was gonna say Janet was def the first to flirt but i think William definitely developed a crush first and they only kept talking bc of said crush so its kinda up for debate. Anyways yeah at first it was a HUGE sorta like "Well he's funny especially when I fluster him so this can be just a fun lil thing" but because they chatted more they def kinda like. Clicked more. William was a huge fan of listening to her music (from. a distance. he looked kinda like a creep but at least janet only misinterpreted it once) but like *specifically* janet he didnt give a fucking shit abt the rest of the band. Uhh. They had their first run-in and janet kinda. Well. Punched him in the nose before he cleared up that he is NOT a pervert or anything weird like that (bc a guy that looks older than he is staring from a distance when there is a clear crowd he could join kinda gave janet the Wrong idea), then they later bumped into each other in the hall and chatted for a bit, then they kinda just kept "accidentally" running into one another. Uhhh. Some cigaerette-themed flirting and a house party later, yay dating :] can you tell where the current cut-off of the fic is /j Also idk how to put this down properly but they are both runaways and can kinda. Get that vibe from one another. Literally Michael is like some fucked up abomination of the both of them between the troubled past + weird situationship thing + runaway stuff + a lot of minor details that arent important rn. I just. Yeah Janet means the world to me go thru her tag on my blog for some art. Not all of my janet art is posted but the non-posted stuff is all concept work/doodles or just. Shit im too embarrassed to post lmao. Anyways NOW im done ty for reading

[katyspersonal]

I know we don't talk and there's stuff we may not agree with. But I am truly sorry you've dealt with a lot of drama over fictional crap. And I'm sorry if my posts in the past ever contributed to that. Hope you have a better day.

Hey... That's all fine, don't worry! After all, it takes a lot of time and Insight to realise that Gehrman is a very gentle and respectful man and Godrick is an absolute gigachad kdkdkshdffhhgfds /lh /lh

But yeah, on a serious note. It was quite frustrating to find out the real motivation under all that... mess was something so pathetic, but at the same time this is what happens when people make engagement with media and fandoms a moral, political act. Not necessarily a problem, after all, I was the one who concluded that the way a fan judges fictional characters and other fans will very well reveal how cruel they are to real people who do something bad, or how much they will forgive based on personal sympathies. And my mad ravings about caring about female characters! I think the problem comes when a fan is so insecure that they have nothing else besides this defence of ideals through fandomry. If your only way to assert yourself is to be a good guy punishing the bad guys, and that mad raving loredigger discovers there is NO bad guy, what is left of you?

This is why it is crucial to have passion for nurturing rather than for undermining! I think if you speak like this, you've found this truth too? This is true that I don't know you very much (mutual-in-law thing), but to be honest.. you didn't poison my fandom experience at all? I tend to never be aware about discourse until someone basically calls me for help fhdhgsdgdfs Can't scout the fandom tag regularly!

But not only it actually was a quite long ago I saw a "negative" post from you, but also I've seen through the posts that my friends liked or reblogged from you that you've actually became very eager person to defend people's passion and interests! I think the post that particularly got stuck with me was when you resented seeing someone's light die after some Redditor asshole "well aktualy"'d a thing they were excited about creating (not exact wording but maybe you remember too)? Like... you are fine, man. At that point I realised that you were a good fan and in the end valued people's creativity and passion over personal preferences. That you never wanted to be THAT guy, even if your interpretation could not be further from someone else's. Coming to terms with what actually matters in fandomry is very mature and I am happy to see this attitude!

I am still glad that you messaged me about this though; I did not expect this, but thank you! I think I will continue getting involved in fictional discourse because my autistic senses cannot ignore factually incorrect takes with a clear insidious motive, and.. eh, sooner or later, I'll piss off the wrong guy again. Don't feel bad for me when it inevitably happens :p I've accepted the shortcomings when I decided to be the debate guy. Simply laughing at some gremlin starting a discourse with the girls in DMs and not stressing over it is only funny until I realise that newer fans could get misinformed right off the bat.

[toxicanonymity]

Do you ever struggle with feelings of discouragement or inadequacy if your fics don’t do as well as you had hoped?

I’m struggling with that myself. I try not to get so hung up on it but it’s very hard, especially when something I’m so proud of doesn’t do as well as my other works.

I don’t even feel motivated to write bc I don’t wanna set myself up for disappointment

Discouragement, sure, I think that's natural sometimes. But I really don't feel like stats have anything to do with adequacy. Baring my soul, yuck. But fuck it we ball. Sorry it's a long answer.

I don't think I've ever answered a serious ask aside from the time i created Dr. rock which hardly counts but I've seen a lot of people struggling with this lately and hope this might be idk comforting to a person or two without leading to debate/discourse.

You mentioned something you're proud of isn't doing as well as your other works, and I can see how that would be disappointing. For laughs, I'll compare 2 of mine. These fics are impossible to compare (as are most, I think) but I def understand the urge to measure yourself against what you see as the potential. Aches: <1k popular trope I banged out in no time, wasn't sure about it, literally thought "people don't have to like it" before I hit post. >4 notes per word. Left in Lincoln: >22k posted so far, challenging, writing it for months. Has possibly driven me crazy bc I had this passing thought the other day and not about TLOU. (I didn't feel like re-reading it all): "I should just rewatch the movie. . .wait." 🤡 The whole Lincoln series combined has fewer notes than Aches lmao. But it's far more rewarding in getting to see it come to life, quality of engagement, and stretching myself 😏. It's not for everyone, for various reasons. Surely would have better stats without the twist I went with. But at what cost??

-------

Often, if people don't read or like something, it's a reflection of their own interests, limitations, and assumptions. And the right "fit."

I don't rly read much in general, but specifically, I rarely read long stuff (if I do I prob scan a lot tbh). I normally only want, if any, just enough plot/premise to build sexual tension. I don't read fluff or angst. I don't have the attention span / commitment to get invested in original characters. I tend to avoid stuff similar to what I'm working on. I make assumptions - If there's no word count, maybe it's too long. I know a lot of the fics I skip for these reasons must be fantastic. Assumptions I experience - I've seen very popular fics in the wild that strike me as dark, creepy, or pervy but aren't tagged that way. So some things that are tagged dark, etc., including plenty of mine, might not be dark in the way people assume based on their own ideas, or based on what others do tag. Also some people think I only write dark when sometimes it's just horny (see master list).

I've sometimes found myself thinking "It sucks more people don't read this bc i bet they would enjoy it" (not just my own fics). It might sound egotistical but I think it's often true.

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Of course I want engagement because that means more people reading something which can mean more interaction, discussion, learning what you liked, what you think, etc. that's what I love.

But notes aren't rly near the top of what I care about, even though it does feel great to get them and I truly appreciate every single one.

Night walks doesn't get nearly as many notes as some of my other stuff, especially these days, but it's fun to write and I like to feed his feral fans who only get more into him with time. Same with raider: among those who do read and engage, I sense rising enthusiasm, thirst, and rate of falling in love with him (my bad). That's all worth more than 1000 likes to me. I have a good time writing these guys, so I write them more than other ones that get way more notes 🤷. I'm not saying notes don't matter at all, I know they affect exposure and engagement. But if just did what gets notes, I don't think I'd have such high quality engagement bc I'd just bang out more stuff with the most popular tropes instead of our fave Joels and those destined to become our faves bc they offer something special.

My outlook was the same before I had so many followers btw. Rock Bottom (22k) was what I felt like writing, still more ambitious than anything I've done in the Halloween fandom. I was disappointed it got way less attention than my one shots, but I know it's a banger, just certainly not for everyone lol.

-

I'm sorry for what you're experiencing and feeling, but I think it's very common and hope you can reframe it to not feel inadequate. I especially hope it doesn't discourage you from writing. ❤️

[sasdavvero]

hi hi okay so

rambles about them under the cut

very small thing: Zero is the most canon Isagi (i try, it's already not canon the fact that he slept with two of the versions. anyway.); Sette is a specific version of Zero that. uh. is more outgoing and. uh. i have no idea how to explain actually. (because all of these pieces of shit are barely version and very OCs so. very unfortunate)

anyway. so. okay. They are supposed to fuck, for the bit (?). Zero would and Sette apparently would too and I wanted to leave the only not-sexual relationship in the whole thingie that between Sette and Hachi? It feels more significant if only they don't fuck.

When I say the bit I mean that it's very funny how Zero would fuck all of them, in a way.

I am also very unsure of the contrary, actually: Sette is a person who relies on sex to feel as a human being, in a way (to be seen, to feel himself, to see a meaning in his existence), main reason why Hachi and he don't fuck: it serves as a way to make him understand that he can be a person without being seen as a sexual object first, so that's what I mean when I say that the relationship between him and Hachi has a very specific and important meaning.

So, if he and Zero fuck, it would confirm his specific idea that he's not a person, in a way. it would be just another relationship he has that's purely based on sex where the other person does not care about other parts of him.

(for context: things are rocky in his universe. exactly because he went overboard with that in bllk. sad!)

I care about Sette a lot and I want him to have friendships and relationships that are not as the ones he has with any other person he knows, and that would mean not making him and Zero fuck, I think?

On another note though, this could be the news in his life: ever since he started having sex with people, he has come to realize that none of the people actually see him as a person (it's mentioned in a story how "people see him" but. they don't. not completely at least. it's a realization he probably had while in bllk (so off screen)) because he is only that, something to be used. But, with Zero, I think I could make him see the other side: if there's a type of relationship where he's simply sexualized and not cared about, and another type where he is not sexualized and is cared about, there can be a new one (for him) where sure, yeah, they fucked, but the person [Zero] does actually see him and cares for him.

does this make sense? no idea

I feel like this is contradicting in some parts: does Sette mind being simply an object or is he human if he is an object? I have not a single clue! I think that's something that's evolving in him: he was a human as an object because that was all he was and that was all he knew. After meeting Hachi, does he feel like being an object is not enough anymore? Does he want not to be one? Maybe! I dont know! That's why I have no idea what to do!!

(btw this does not take into consideration the relationship he has with Seika, as he considers her as some kind of sister he never had, so we'll leave her out of the debate)

(I will think about his relationship with Yon in a moment that's not now. What's yet to be written does not matter)

(we will not even take into consideration Kyuu as they would not even talk with Sette. (too busy making Hachi's life hell. For more info, see last sentence above))

this is more complicated than this and I barely have half of it in my mind, so I'm even more shit at explaining, sorry :(

in case anyone is interested, I'll link here the ao3 series about them! and yeah, I will see what to do I guess?

[matchbookarmy]

Okay, I'm back. Sorry I needed a bit of a break from things. Just from everything. Not this blog but everything in [gestures vaguely] life.

As some of you know, my phone broke back over the summer and I lost all of my open tabs and where I was on my journey. That definitely was a setback and I didn't know how I wanted to handle it.

But now that I've had time to think about it, I've decided to.... restart my journey.

Lol.

Now I know you probably think I'm insane, but here are my reasons. When I first started reading I was only reading MCU based fic because I thought you had to choose a fandom on AO3. It wasn't for a while before I figured out I could just click on the ship's tag and see everything. So I was severely lacking in 616 fic. Also I didn't read everything when I started. I tended to skip AUs, a lot of the more kinky stuff. As I read more I opened myself up to a lot more types of fics.

And then finally my last reason is I want to change the way I interact with fic and fandom. I want to comment more and read WIPs and I dunno. I want to share and spread my enthusiasm. I also want to pull back in some ways, *except* on this blog. I want to get to know you and gush with you all about these two guys we love so much and all the creativity that gets poured into this fandom and this ship and these characters, the blood the sweat and the tears of it all.

So feel free to message me about anything. I try to be good about answering requests, though, I don't always have a fic that perfectly matches what you want.

I was thinking there's the findingstony blog that finds specific fic that you know exists, but maybe this would be a good place for people to submit things that they are looking for that they haven't already found. Like more general requests of tropes or plots that you want to read. Again I'll do my best to match you with something, but I'll also put them out to my followers (I don't have a ton but we'll see what the community can do).

Anyway, I'd like this to be a community to talk about all these things we love. I know I still have 2-3 unanswered asks, and I haven't forgotten them. For the person who asked for heartwrenching angst with or without a happy ending, I'm trying to decide if I want to rec you the most heart-shattering fic I have ever read. 🤔🤔🤔 (Are you open to Tony being evil?)

Anyway, does this restart mean that I may never get to some truly amazing fics at the end of the alphabet? Almost certainly. There are over 55k Stony fics on AO3. The first time I did this was a ship that had about 500 fics. I read them all in a couple months. I'm not going to complain about having too much good stuff.

But you can feel free to send in your own recs as well. Again, I'd love this to be a community, and a conversation.

Okay, well... I'm off to read. A couple of notes.

I will attempt to read every fic. There will be some that I do not finish. It might just be that it's not to my personal taste.

When I say everything, I do mean *everything*, which means that I may rec some fics that have content that you don't like. I will tag my posts accordingly. I'm not here to debate the ethics of fictional depictions of fictional characters in a fictional relationship with anyone.

I'm going to post as I go through. It's just easier for me that way. Also this way you can literally see my journey, lol. Posts will be scheduled for Saturdays, one post per week, unless my drafts start to get really full, in which case I'll bump it up to two posts per week.

Sometimes I may open a fic and save it in an open tag if I'm not in the right headspace for it, or if I want to read it but I'm not connecting with it at the moment. Or, if it's a really long fic, sometimes I'll intersperse other shorter fics in between chapters. So just because I skip a fic doesn't mean I didn't like it, or I thought it was bad.

Though I will give everything a shot, in general, kid fic is just not my thing, so you're unlikely to see many recs with that topic. But feel free to send in your own fic recs if there's something you really love. I'm sure others would love it as well.

I also generally tend to be not a fan of kink involving bodily fluids other than spit, sweat and semen, but I will give them a chance. Just don't expect a lot of recs for those. Also I'm not really a fan of age play. It's just not my thing.

The only hard pass for me is anything that tries to villainize Steve for MCU Civil War. That's a hard no for me.

Okay, I accidentally added a poll and it won't let me delete it, so....

Lmao - that was supposed to say goodness not goddess. 🙃🙃🙃 This is why I don't do polls. I am far too much of a mess to handle this kind of responsibility.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Hey m, what's your stance on separation of the art from the artist when it comes to the artist being of a questionable character?

And on a wholly separate note, did you ever talk of Letter and Jimin and Jungkook and if there's a case for interpreting the song as most shippers have done?

Wow, that is a totally separate note there, anon 😆

But let's start with the first part of your ask. I'm sure I've written about this in the past, but my tagging system is not the best. Anyway..

What I can tell you is that there is no definitive answer. Which is probably boring because we're "supposed" to pick a side and stick to it. Regardless of our position, it's almost expected for us to be radical. I've had this exact debate so many times, with people of different ages and backgrounds. It's an ongoing debate and I really don't think there is a correct way of looking at it. I think that the more we try and move away from an abstract position and rather look at the particularities, it would be easier to understand our own arguments and how/why we choose to accept or dismiss some people. Then we also have to keep in mind what is condered questionable character. Does its definition include a general understanding of a person that is accepted all across the board? Or our own character and world views influence the way we perceive other people? And sometimes, there's another element that perhaps it's easily explicable, but in my mind, it's the one about a lack of logic. I'll give you an example. It's close to impossible for me to rewatch CMBYN because of Hammer's cannibalism allegations, more than the ones of abuse against women. I also publicly and vehemently condemn Woody Allen because I believe he is guilty of what he's been accused of, but it doesn't mean I will also never watch Annie Hall. Does that say that I'm a bad person? A hypocrite? Maybe. But it also says that I can't help but be subjective depending on each singular situation and that some of my views don't have any logic even in my own mind.

But these are extreme cases, of people who had actual charges brought against them. There are countless others that are usually accused of wide range of things, from sexism, racism, homophobia to xenophobia, you name it. Everything under the sun. Some people will not care, while others will. It's an individual choice. Not only a moral one, but economic as well.

I'd like to end this though by saying that I personally don't expect art to be made only by morally righteous people. I think that's a dangerous trap that leads to just another type of extremism.

Now, the second part, a bit more fun!

The only time I mentioned Letter was in one of my early posts on the new blog. I said it reminds me of a studio Ghibli movie but that I also have a more personal attachment to it.

I know how it's been interpreted by jikookers. I personally don't subscribe to the theory, but not for some major reason. I think it's nice Jimin had Jungkook do the backing vocals and seeing him sing during a livestream was moving. That's sort of enough for me. I think it's perfectly possible for the song to really be a letter to his fans. What I'm trying to say is that as much as it is really sweet, if it's for Jungkook or not, it doesn't have a major bearing on my opinion regarding them.

But I want to be very clear that just because I believe that, it doesn't mean I have an issue or condemn any jikooker who believes in the theory that it's a song for JK and about them. It's a harmless theory that is not based on any toxic or weird narrative. People should be free to talk about it, without having condescending anons or bloggers making fun of it or even criticising it too harshly. I've seen that happen a lot after the album was released.

P.S. Anon, I just saw your second ask. I'd rather stick to my answer as it is now, without going into any RM specifics as of today. I'm not in the mood for that.

[blakbonnet]

15 questions

I was tagged by @xoxoemynn @not-nervous-jester and @skysofrey <3

1. Are you named after anyone?

My shitty father was/is a giant history nerd and named me after a manuscript (my official name i mean lmao). The manuscript has two parts - the first part became my nickname and the second part became my official name 🤷‍♀️

2. When was the last time you cried?

Maybe April last year, I had a massive fight with someone and burst into tears 😭 Yeah I don't cry that often, more of a let the agonies eat you alive from the inside kinda person

3. Do you have kids?

No and I don't want them either :)

4. Do you use sarcasm?

Nah, idk who she is 🤷‍♀️

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Usually how they treat waiters at a restaurant irl and how angry they get over little things, massive red flag for me. Online, it's def based on how rude they are to people over stupid small stuff. I'll either soft block or straight up unfollow if your idea of fun is putting people down constantly or just being a general dick about fandom stuff that should be fun 🤷‍♀️

6. What’s your eye colour?

Brown eyes like Ed :))

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I am a massive chicken when it comes to horror! I like the idea of it but I actually do get scared so so much 😭 I can do horror podcasts though but movies/shows etc give me actual sleepless nights. Happy endings all the way babyyy!

8. Any special talents?

Not really, I guess once I watch a show/movie and if I like it (pay attention), I kinda don't need a rewatch for the next year, I can play bits over in my mind if needed lmao

9. Where were you born?

In a hospital where a lot of people in my family were born (strange question!)

10. What are your hobbies?

Reading, puzzles, drawing, and writing :')

11. Do you have any pets?

Yes, I have a dog called Bilbo who recently turned 10. My parents have 4 other dogs called Casper, Eva, Chi, and Tingmo ❤️

12. What sports do you play/have played?

My right knee is busted and I hate physical exercise so I don't play anything adfjvdbf but I used to play cricket in school ✌️ Ooh and I was on the debate team which is a sport to me ahem

13. How tall are you?

5’5”

14. Favourite subject in school?

English, art, economics (yeah Im a giant nerd)

15. Dream job?

Exactly what I'm doing right now, but when I was a kid, I wanted to be a writer :)

I'm gonna tag @ella-doe @talkstoself @sherlockig and @aha-my-villainous-thoughts (no pressure obv and feel free to lmk if you hate getting tagged in stuff like this)

[discodeviant]

5 Things You Never Get Tired Of Writing: tagged by @ariesbilly ✨💖

rules: list five things you never get tired of writing. it can be tropes, themes, characters, phrases, whatever brings you joy. then tag five people!

tagging @writer-in-theory @whenyouwishuponastar7 @feverreaver @ihni @decadentworld @harringrovest @prettyboybillyhargrove @dragonflylady77 <3 obv no pressure babes I just think u r all very cool and am interested in what you have to say! also definitely tag me if u do it pls and ty

5. ROMANCE: Duh, it's like 90% of the shit I write lmao. I am the hopeless romantic of hopeless romantics, and I only want happy endings (even if said "happy ending" is debatably positive or otherwise bittersweet; if they end up together, I'm satisfied). Point being, I am a fucking sap and not afraid to admit it. My favorite kind is falling in love, so I will read and write the same two characters doing just that a hundred times over and want it a hundred times more. If it says "_____ to lovers" gimme gimme gimme.

4. SEX WORK: Bit out of left field, but I enjoy many different forms of sex work in romance and angst (i.e. phone operators like my fic includes, call boys on the corner, porn/streaming, chatting, etc etc). This is one of the few subjects I don't mind writing in a modern setting for, because technology can actually make it interesting in ways that it doesn't for me otherwise. And going into my next point...

3. PERIOD PIECES: Anything set before 2005 or so is my go-to, mostly because I just really don't find it interesting to write within a time frame I'm familiar with. Especially not social media. There are a few exceptions--Kurt Kunkle being one of them since his whole thing is based around this specific era of the internet, but generally I prefer older settings. 70s-90s are my favorite, I like the 20s-40s for mob and war stuff, 18-19th centuries are fun too. Medieval shenanigans from time to time, I'm not too picky :P

Stemming from this, I also do like stories set far into the future (like DBH, which granted isn't that far, but it feels far) because it's also unfamiliar, and there's a lot you can do with tech that doesn't exist!

2. WORLDBUILDING: Not something I share, but I've been deeply invested in it since middle school--constructed languages, religion, politics, species, races, biology, etc. It's just fucking fascinating. And while it's a hobby that I sort of drop and pick back up from time to time, it's always always always just as interesting when I go back to it. The interest stemmed from when I found out that Simlish wasn't just random garble, and then I learned that Na'vi is a heavily developed language, which led me to the world of conlang, and now I'm a linguistics nerd on the downlow, so. Yeah. I've got ideas on how to incorporate that into Stranger Things; maybe I'll write them xD

1. CHARACTER STUDIES: And, at the top of the list, by contrast, I don't actually give a shit about the world most of the time. I want to dig into one character's brain with a hammer and chisel and feel every sense through words on the page. Goes hand in hand with romance, but I'm interested in relationships as a whole (romantic, platonic, siblings, parent/child, etc), and I want it from one perspective at a time. I want to see how a character evolves through the circumstances. What motivates them, what's their breaking point, what makes them shut down, what makes them desperate enough to beg. I'm more interested in internal struggles than external, which is what you'll find in my longfics since there's more room to explore, and that's how I tend to form characters in my head.

So, tldr, old-timey romance with a dose of modern influence that's seen through one character, and--separately--textbook-level info on the complexities of a constructed world :)